The prime minister gave far and away the most powerful, emotional and gamechanging leader’s speech of the century
Words I thought I’d never write. We owe a huge debt of gratitude to the Tory party. Look, I know we ended up with Theresa May and Boris Johnson in the Conservative party leadership contests of 2016 and 2019 – and they were shockers, both of them – but at least the Tory MPs twice ensured we dodged the bullet of Michael Gove. Last week, Sky broadcast The War Game, a reality show for superannuated politicians and former senior civil servants and military officers. The setup was that the Russians had engineered an attack on a British warship in the North Sea and over the course of four episodes set in the Cobra emergency situation room, the assembled cast had to figure how to respond. We were left hanging at the final credits, but a nuclear apocalypse felt like the most likely outcome. And for that we have The Govester to thank. He was playing the prime minister and – to be blunt – he had an absolute shocker. For the first two episodes he seemed to be in a coma. All he could manage was to repeat back what the last person had said to him and then shout “asap”. But that was far more preferable to the Gove that turned up for the last two episodes. Despite frequently being warned about the dangers of escalation and the inadequacy of the UK war machine, Mikey kept on taking the option that would get the most people killed. Why bomb one Russian city when you can bomb two? The game ended with what were almost certainly nuclear warheads minutes away from destroying a major city in the UK. Still, Gove wasn’t the only deadbeat. Nicola Sturgeon, acting the deputy prime minister, was as hopeless as you would expect of someone who failed to notice her kitchen filling up with new appliances. It was terrifying TV. Not so much in the premise. What was really scary was the knowledge that our politicians were even more clueless than the rest of us.
